As drunk as a skunk ! - Free - [ ENG ]
Nombre de messages : 937
Age : 37
Feuille de personnage
Camp: Le bien
|Sujet: As drunk as a skunk ! - Free - [ ENG ] Dim 10 Jan - 19:17
Hogward, on the grass. 11 a.m.
I hate it.
This feeling is following me since that awful day. There is nothing to do to make it disapear, and I know I have to live with it until the end of my life. But now I don’t care, it’s a part of me, it’s what makes me as I am. I’ve decided to accept it.
It’s obviously not a good thing, but is it really evil?
I don’t know. I’m not a wicked person deeply inside, but I’m not a Saint too.
The atmosphere here is very different as these in Bulgaria. In fact, I know I’m mellowing since I’m here, probably because the United-Kingdom’s inhabitants are nicest, funiest, and especially freakest as those in Bulgarian. There’s much fun here, much crazyness.
I’d thought to go back home, but ... where’s my home?
Gwladys turn totally fool those days, so I considere I’ve no real family anymore ( expect Wauthier, but he’s not an Unless member as I hear it ). Nobody’s waiting for me... nowhere.
That sucks, I’m totally useless. Mother phoque.
Since I’m here I behave myself like a big child. A naïve, candide, probably a little bit stupid child. I liked playing that part, I felt so free, I had nothing to worry about. I used my grand-mother flat ( which she gave me befor leaving I-don’t-know-where ), and when I wanted to leave my problemes I just put myself in Sand’s shoes ( which was very easy for me ), and play with people’s feeling. Now this time is over. And I lost this pleasur to pretend to be someone I’m not.
I peer the park around me. Nobody.
Yeah ! I can drown my sadness in alcohol ! Even if it’s not really sadness that I feel. I’s more complicated than that. It’s deeper. It’s more profond. It’s my essence @___@ ...
I’m not an alcoholic if it’s what you’re thinking –‘.
We’re not all like my useless secretary. Who’s not alcoholic anymore actually. But we don’t care, because she hates me whatever way.
And it’s worst those days, maybe because of her pregnency.
I take my wand and a bottle of wisky appear in front of my hand.
I expected vodka.
Well... It doeasn’t matter, I like wisky too. I’m a man ... of wealth and taste, I’ve been around or longs, long years stole many a mans soul and faith ... @___@
Aherm. Actually not really, that’s corresponding more at my dead brother.
Dead... He’s dead, but now he’s probably as happy as a pig in shit.
He’s the devil, I can just be another demon.
I don’t wanna be more.
I just want to enjoy the life ! Even if I’ve to do thing I don’t use to do.
I want my life to have a meaning !
I want to be a real Unless again.
I want ... I want ...
Oh Lord... I want a stronger alcohol ><.
I look at my ... empty bottle ?
Already O_o ?
Jesus... And I’m not saying completely meaningless thing ? ... that’s not right ‘___’.
Silly empty bottle.
Go full again @___@.
It’s an order.... or you’ll be punisched.
This time I wish ... Hum ... The Green Fairy ! \o/
In a few minutes I’ll be completely drunk.
But I don’t care ! I’m the cat’s whiskers ! All my geese are swans !
I’m the powerful headmaster of this full of mad people’s school and I like it ! I don’t obey anybody @__@.
Come on little green fairy, I just want to escape...
[ HRP : Sorry for my bad english, if you don't understant that probably normal U_u ]
|Please allow me to introduce myself|
Im a man of wealth and taste
Pleased to meet you
Hope you guess my name
Johnny T. Walker
F*ck me I'm famous ~ Sex symbol
Nombre de messages : 611
Age : 25
Maison : Un carton jamais au même endroit ! =)
Emploi : Glandeur à plein temps
Humeur : Aléatoire
Feuille de personnage
Côté coeur: Jade Patterson, ma presque femme!
|Sujet: Re: As drunk as a skunk ! - Free - [ ENG ] Mer 13 Jan - 0:48
I'm a crazy man.
Oh no .. Not that story again !
Actually, you can't say I'm crazy. I'm just totally fucked up. And that is my only problem. I guess... It all began the night mrs. Young asked us to come and I saw his body ... The cold and silent body of my best friend. I didn't know how to react.
Was it true ? Wasn't it all just an awful nightmare ? Will I wake up and hold him in my arms like I've done a million times ?
No. I'll never wake up, I'm living a nightmare nowadays. I'll never see him again. He's gone, he has left us .. It's sad, so fucking sad. I feel empty inside. So empty.
I want to be strong again, I want to be happy, to love.
Okay, I love Jade, and all my friends but that isn't enough. I need a big brother. Someone who helps me, someone who supports me. But where can I find someone like that? Is there anyone in the world who would last longer than a day in my company ?
I hope so.. I don't want to feel this empty my whole life. It's just unfair. I miss him, my best frend, my brother, my soulmate. I've done everything with him... I guess. I'm not sure, even he doesn't know. What have we done that night ? =O Neither of us nows. And I guess I'll never know...
I'm all on my own, in my room in Hogwards. All alone. The room is almost empty, I've never brought some stuff to put here. I thought I'd never come and sleep here. Most of the time I went out every night and came back drunk as hell. But not here, to my own home. I've got a home, but.. I'm not there anymore.
I'm at Hogwards all the time now, I love this place because it holds so mutch memories. I remember many things of my time in this school. It's funny to be here, I become so nostalgic @____@
But Fuck. I don't want to be nostalgic because it makes me sad.
And I don't like being sad because it makes me look so weak.
And I don't want to be weak, I want to be the strongest person on Earth.
How can I be strong ? Who can teach me ? No one can. I'm useless now. Until my death. Unless someone comes ... Someone from above. Unless .. Unless @___@ That name will be in my mind forever, I'll always think about him. Even when I see his brother. Nathan ... I love him to !
I think Nathan is a friend too. I'm not sure but... Maybe he considers me as a friend to. Who knows ? I should ask him once, if I'm his friend. Maybe he'll laugh about me because I'm so stupid. And that is true. I am so stupid !
But who cares ? No one notices me. When I walk through the school, the boys don't look at me, only the girls. And they smile at me. Maybe they like me, I don't know. I'm happy my sweet Jade doesn't see them... She would kill them !
Yeah, Jade is a killer. She can be really horrible, but never to me. Except when she's having a period... You know, when her pantys become red ? >.< That happens once a month, and it is horrible ! I wish girls didn't have to lose all that blood and be so cranky all the time ! =O
I hate it when she's having her period. First of all, it's disgusting. Then it's annoying, and finally we can't have sex !
That's the most horrible thing... Not having sex. You know, I'm an addict. I'm not very proud of it, but it just is like that. I even slept with a guy. But not just a guy... The beautiful, the most perfect man on earth : Nathan Unless.
I want to see him again ...
I want to talk to him again ...
I have to find Nathan Unless !
That's why on this wonderful morning I search through the castle, looking for my friend.
I go to his desk, Jade isn't there ... I look under the desk, behind a door, behind a lamp. But he isn't there. I call his name, no answer. He's not there !
So I go to the kitchen, and ask the little elfs if they can help me. They give me a lot of food but not what I was looking for .. Hum. They gave me a bag with three bottles of Vodka =O
And with my "gling-gling"-ing bag, I go to the tower. Maybe he had to send a letter? But no, he's not between the owls. Too bad ! I look out the window and see someone on the grass. It looks like him but I'm not sure.
So I run.
My bag makes a lot of noise, but I don't care.
People look at me like I'm crazy, but I am.
I run faster.
I run until I get out of the castle.
And then I walk.
I walk until I'm behind him.
I was right, it was Nathan sitting there. He doesn't look like he is fine .. He looks.. Drunk O___o
He's got a bottle in his hand... Poor him, he must be devastated. Let's not talk about it.
I want to be drunk to, with him.
- Hi Nathan ...
I look at him and smile.
Then I sit next to him. He must know he's not alone.
I'm here with him, for him. To help.
- You look wasted ! What have you been drinking ?!
I smell his shirt, it has got the smell of alcohol all over it !
I take out a bottle of Vodka and start to drink too.
If he's drunk, I wanna be too !
(Okay one bottle won't hurt me, and I might have to stay sober for him...)
Yeah, I decide to stay sober for him. That's why I put back my bottles and push my bag far-far-faaar away ! I can't see it !
I can't be drunk. I have to help him. But maybe he's hallucinating and I want it too ...
Nooo ! I'm not an alcoholic ! Not at all ! Okay .. Maybe a little bit. So what ? I'm not drinking now, I'm strong ! For Nathan.
- So .. It's been a long time huh ?
I look at the sky.
Silly question ...
I'm thinking about his brother, I miss him... But I need to help Nathan. Because I love him too!
[ By the way : Tadaaaa ! If you don't want me say it xDD I'll erase my message =o ]
As drunk as a skunk ! - Free - [ ENG ]